Starting Over - It Only Gets Better!

At the age of 38 I left the only career I had ever known to start over. Like many people I was looking for a better standard of living for both myself and my family. I had invested over 20 years in a military career and was at the top of my chosen field -- for which I received about $40,000 a year. Although the thought of starting over when I was almost 40 was daunting, I set a goal to make $100,000 a year within five years, hung up my guns, and ventured into civilian life. That was 20 years ago. I hit my goal of $100,000 a year in less than three years and went on to become a corporate director with a salary of over $200,000 a year in just over 10 years. But that's a story for another time. This article is about starting over.

In the past 20 years I have learned that there really is no starting over in life. We torture ourselves with self-depreciating thoughts that we have failed, wasted x number of years, or squandered our youth climbing the wrong mountain. When, in reality, we have gained new viewpoints, new skills, and new energetic patterns. You see, you can't start over because every day when the sun rises, you start from where you are and where you are changes with every life experience. I'm sure you've heard people say "if I could only go back to when I was 17 and do it again, things would be different!" But, as we know, we can't! It's the same with thinking you have to start over; it's not only a misperception, it's impossible! There is no regression - life moves forward!

If you have saved your money for the past 20 years to buy a house and then you change your mind and decide to buy a boat, do you tell yourself that you are starting over? No! You are simply redirecting your investment toward a new goal. It's the same with life. If you have invested the past 20 years running a log mill and now you want to sell real estate, do you tell yourself that you are starting over? Yes, most people do, and that's the flawed premise! The energetic truth is that you are simply redirecting your investment toward a new goal. In those 20 years running the log mill you learned supply & demand, interpersonal communications, finance, planning, and a host of other things. You also developed your intuition, learned the value of integrity, made friends, fell in love, walked your dog, and marveled at nature. All of those things changed who you are both intellectually and spiritually. Given all those millions of events, experiences, and feelings, you could not go back to who you were 20 years ago and start over if your life depended on it! As Dr. Wayne Dyer was famous for saying "if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." You did not spend 20 years, you invested 20 years. You are not starting over, you are redirecting your investment toward a new goal.

And one more thing (my tribute to Steve Jobs), you are never too old to redirect your investment toward a new goal. I'm 58 and planning to redirect my investments from the past 40 years into a new goal. I'll check back in with you in 2038 and let you know how it went!

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Baby Steps To Begin Again

How do you make a new start? A new life for yourself? How do you pick yourself up again? How do you get yourself back after something's happened? Or after something hasn't happened for a while and you're bored beyond belief with him/your job/your life/that way of being that hurts you?

Beginnings and endings. They have the power to make you twice the woman you are or leave you in a big bundled mess on the floor.

To weep or to whoop whoop? That is the question. That's why it's so important for you to be a big beautiful support to yourself, because you hold the power right now to completely and utterly inspire yourself with this new way of being.

Or not. You could fight it wishing it would all go back to the way it was. But it can't. Dammit. New beginnings are here.

Have you ever wanted to feel absolutely amazing and powerful and strong when a new life is handed to you by the universe? But stress and doubt come creeping in? You're worried about what will happen to you... Worried about how it will all be? You've likely come to the end of a life cycle. So to see you through so you feel good with glitter on top I've written this little guide for you:

7 Baby Steps to Begin Again so you move forward into your new life with ease, grace and fabulousness!

And what's the first baby step?

1. Um... it's exhaustion. First stage of newness. Might be speckled with euphoria in places. A new hair cut. A new juice you've just discovered for your mornings. And then, exhaustion. Feeling irritated. Unexplained bad mood. Your needs at this point are basic. Good food. Good sleep. Safety. Good people. Don't try to reach for the stars right now. You'll not be feeling it. If you skip this bit and lunge for No.2 and go all self-helpy you'll slip back here to No.1, but then it will be No.1 + beating self up. So don't bother. Give it a miss. Watch telly. Sleep. Cry. Just be.

2. Thinking time. Second stage of newness. You're ready. Not for your new life yet. But you're ready to think about it. Write it out. Say it to someone you trust. Dare to reach for the stars in your thoughts and on paper. You'll feel better.

3. Energy time. Third stage of newness. Time to build your energy doing what you love. Start with your body. You won't feel like it but do it anyway. Move it. In the only way that makes you happy. Dance to 3 tracks every morning before work. Sing your heart out in the shower. Hit the gym, yoga class, the whatever you fancy class. If you don't energise your body you won't have energy to create this new life you want. Skip this and you'll falter start most days. Which will pull you back to No.1. No thank you.

4. Spirit time. Fourth stage of newness. Your spirit and soul are beginning to wake up. Listen to them. They'll begin to send you the newness beginnings like little bird songs. Feed them what they need to lift you. What new delicious ritual would you look forward to every day? A meditation app to listen to on the way to work? Chakra dancing? Painting with your fingers? Tending to your flowers, drawing fragrant warm baths for yourself, you know what I'm saying here? This is where you tend to the gentler more sensitive part of your nature. Feed yourself your highest possibility here. Again, do it with a girlfriend if you keep messing this bit up. She'll support you and you'll not want to let her down. (Soul kismet.)

5. Why? Why do you want this? This is your fifth stage of newness. And it's so, so needed. Write it on a piece of paper. There. That's why. You need your why. It will pull you out of bed on a morning you'd really rather not. It will make you make that phone call to get help. It will make you take action when you'd rather slip into the old way of being. Your "why" is the reason why you're doing this. Your "why" makes YOU more important than your excuses. Write it out and carry it with you. It's your best friend for your new life. Look at it regularly. There, that's why.

6. Pleasure time. Sixth stage of newness. Give yourself fun in abundance. You need fun and happiness and sparkles and gorgeous luscious pleasure dotted daintily throughout your day. A woman like you HAS to have something to look forward to, always. What turns you on?

7. Action time! Seventh stage of newness. Now you've got the energy to tackle that. Whatever that is. You're ready to stop doing that thing, or to start doing that thing. You're ready to begin your new life! This is outward action - calling up for a new job, putting your profile up on a dating website, asking for what you want, joining a course, calling someone to help you, making that move. Finally. Yes. You're ready to put this new beginning into action! It will feel good. Frantic sometimes. Pace yourself. Do not give up energy time and spirit time.

There you have it. 7 baby steps to the new you, new life, new way of being. Here's to new beginnings! YES! Let this time be a breath of fresh air for you - trust it - new beginnings suit you!

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How Robert Downey Jr Turned His Life Around, Rebuilt Himself, & Skyrocketed To Success

He was in a tail-spin.

His life burning to the ground... trapped in drug addiction... fired from the show Ally McBeal... and even sent to prison. No one dared to hire him. You'd never guess it today. But years ago, that was actor Robert Downey Jr.

Yet - he turned his life around... rebuilt himself... and skyrocketed to become Iron Man.

How?

Here are four secrets that turbo-charged his comeback. Even if you don't have dreams of being a dynamic actor (or actress)... even if you're facing a different "enemy"... even if you don't even like superhero movies... these four lessons (when implemented) can help you rise back up, rebuild yourself and resurrect yourself to a new level.

Iron Man's 4 Secrets to Rising From Rock-Bottom

1. Laser-Beam Focus On Taking The Next Step

Just like Tony Stark slaving away in a cave to build the original Iron Man suit. Downey's climb out of the darkness took seven years. He rebuilt his credibility, his commitment and his self-confidence one day at a time. One movie at a time. One job at a time.

He says:

I found my way out of the woods

by a subtler and subtler trail of bread crumbs

-Robert Downey Jr.

Not Hulk-like leaps forward. Small relentless steps forward.

(Remember progress is progress)

2. You Can Always Build Your Self-Discipline Muscles

At first, Downey doubted his ability to leave a life of drugs. He knew it was wrecking everything. But kept going back. With the help of Wing Chun (Chinese martial art) he built up his concentration... laser-like focus... and inner calm. This finally busted the vice-grip that drugs had over him.

3. Knowing It's Okay To Ask For Help

When Downey had demonstrated his commitment to staying sober, producers still had ice cold feet. They swore he'd bail out. But Mel Gibson (who had his own demons) who worked with him on a previous film - jumped to the rescue. He believed in Downey so much that he put up collateral to reassure producers.

This gave Downey his shot to star in The Singing Detective... showing audiences and Hollywood that he was heaven-bent on taking his life back. But if Downey was too proud to accept Gibson's help, this never would have happened.

4. Total Belief That Your Skills Will Eclipse Your Past Mistakes

At first, Marvel Comics didn't want anything to do with him. Jon Favreau, director of Iron Man, fought tooth and nail to persuade the studio to hire him. He saw Downey's electricity. He saw his dynamite acting skills overshadowed his dark past.

Here was this force of nature,

who I think was living with this frustration

that he wasn't able to really show what he was great at

-Jon Favreau

That greatness lies within each and every one of us.

We are all forces of nature in our own way.

Find what it is for you.

And start building... rebuilding... and creating something (or becoming someone) that you're proud of.

Because the past does not have to equal the future.

P.S. Besides Wing Chun, there are other powerhouse techniques for quickly tapping more inner strength, inner peace, self-discipline and bringing gusto and confidence when you wake up each morning. One way is an ancient Asian technique that gives you the strength to rapidly rebound from stressful situations. Plus, studies find it develops the "happy region" (left frontal lobe) of the brain.

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